


Blinded by the Light

by travelledspace (wildestoftales)



Category: Kingsman (Movies), Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Blind Date, Crossover, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, eventually polyamory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 18:12:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9778535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wildestoftales/pseuds/travelledspace
Summary: “I mean,” Jim says, looking up again. He doesn't look happy at all but the prominent frown disappears after a moment, “I've never had never-gonna-see-each-other-again sex. On a beach, no less. How about you?”Eggsy thinks back to some of his missions. He raises his eyebrows and shrugs.“No way!” Jim says. “You did? You just ruined my whole come-on.”“Well,” Eggsy says slowly. “It wasn't on a beach, last time. So. Still works.”Moving closer, Jim puts his hand on Eggsy's waist again. “Good enough for me.”





	1. Chapter 1

“I'm not really a suit and tie kinda guy,” Jim protests.

Uhura eyes the light blue skinny tie for a moment longer, then tosses it at Jim. He fails to catch it. Gathering the tie up from the floor by his feet, Jim tries to act like he never meant to catch it anyway.

Uhura smiles indulgently. “Yeah, I know. You'd run around in that old leather jacket whenever you're out of uniform if you could.”

“What's wrong with my jacket?” 

“There's a _blood stain_ on it.”

“On the _inside_ ,” Jim replies in the same incredulous tone. “Where no one can see it.”

Uhura wrinkles her nose. “I really don't know why I signed up for a mission with you.”

Jim loops the tie around his neck and gives her his bright trademark shit-eating grin. “Because, first of all, you love me. Second, you love space. And third, you take a weird pleasure in hooking me up with some guy from your combat class.”

She doesn't deny any of the accusations. She probably thinks it's below her to even address them. 

Jim takes it as an admission.

“So, I'm wearing an atrocious blue tie. What about him?”

“Blue tie, too. But navy blue.”

“Why does he get a perfectly normal navy blue and I get,” Jim waves the tie that's still hanging loosely around his neck at her, “this baby blue nonsense.”

Stretching out on his dorm bed like it's her own, Uhura shrugs.

Jim huffs at the lack of an answer. “Well, I'm _not_ wearing a suit jacket.”

–

The guy is in dark tight jeans, a white shirt underneath a black suit jacket, combined with a light blue tie. But, if Eggsy is to be honest, it takes him a second to notice the details of the guy's outfit.

It's his eyes that stand out first. His mouth is second. He has very nice lips.

Wearing a slight smile, the guy drops down on the bar stool next to Eggsy.

“So it's you, then?” he asks which doesn't make much sense.

Eggsy knows there is no one else sitting at the bar this early, had noticed it when he had come in and ordered a whiskey, so he doesn't need to take a look around.

The guy has to be talking to him.

“I'm Jim,” he says and waves the bartender over to order a bourbon for himself. “You still good?” he asks, motioning towards Eggsy's glass.

Eggsy hasn't even taken a sip yet and he's unexpectedly taken aback by this guy's – Jim's – direct approach, so he simply nods. 

“You don't have a name?” Jim asks when Eggsy doesn't say anything for a few more moments, teasing glint in his eyes now.

“Strictly classified,” Eggsy replies because he is never above using hints of the truth to flirt; secret agent is just too good to pass up on. One day, he figures, Merlin is going to make good of his threat and use that new secret serum that paralyses the vocal chords to shut Eggsy up permanently.

But Merlin's neither listening nor watching right now. Eggsy took the glasses off as soon as the mission was completed.

“Alright, 007,” Jim grins at him. His eyes are very bright, even in the dim lightning at the bar. “That's weird but don't worry; I like weird.”

The way Jim doesn't quite wink at him is intriguing in its own right.

Eggsy can't help but be charmed. It's a novel feeling – he's usually the one charming others.

“It's Eggsy,” he says and raises his glass just as Jim's bourbon arrives. They clink glasses and each take a sip.

“Eggsy, yeah? That's cute.”

Raising an eyebrow, Eggsy puts his glass back down.

“I mean, I've never heard it before but,” Jim pauses and Eggsy recognises it as the pause before the delivery of a line; has used it himself enough to recognise it now, “you're cute, so. The name's cute, too. Naturally.”

“Not a bad one, mate. A solid seven out of ten, I'd say. Personally, I wouldn't have gone for cute. Attractive, maybe.”

Jim laughs, delighted. It's a good laugh, spontaneous and more natural than anything he's done or said before now. 

“Everyone's a critic these days,” Jim says. “I'd like to see your skills.”

“You will, if you're lucky.”

Jim turns on his bar stool, body angled completely towards Eggsy now. Eggsy can't help but mirror the gesture; this guy is the most exciting thing to have happened to him in the US and he'd successfully foiled an assassination ploy on the president. 

“So, what track are you on? Probably security, right?”

“Security?” Eggsy echoes.

“They always have the hottest guys. Uhura only mentioned you have combat together, but combat's a mandatory class for everyone.”

Eggsy halts. 

He has no idea what Jim is talking about. He doesn't know anyone named Uhura and he certainly doesn't take a combat class with them.

“What are you talking about? What tracks?”

Jim's eyebrows knit together in a frown. “At the academy? Starfleet? I'm in command.”

Eggsy shakes his head, gathering his words to let Jim now he's got no idea what he's talking about, when another guy suddenly appears in the small space between them, face turned towards Jim.

“Uh,” he says, “I might be wrong but – are you my blind date?”

Jim's eyes flit between Eggsy and the new arrival. His hair is black and very short, and he's taller than Eggsy, definitely. Eggsy doesn't need to be standing up to know that.

Bedrudgingly, Eggsy has to admit he's not half bad-looking.

“Oh,” Jim says to Eggsy. “You're not–?”

He doesn't finish his question, instead turns to the new guy, frowning, “You're navy tie guy?”

Oh. Suddenly what Jim had said at the beginning makes more sense. He's on a blind date. Just not with Eggsy.

It explains quite a lot – everything, really. Jim had simply confused him with his actual blind date because Eggsy is wearing a navy tie, just like said blind date was apparently supposed to.

And now the guy is here. 

Navy Tie Guy nods in one sharp movement. He seems embarrassed to have interrupted. Eggsy doesn't know for sure what Jim and he looked like from the outside second ago, but he can guess. 

“I was just… Sorry for being late,” he says. “I can leave?” He's unsure now, his gaze flitting towards Eggsy.

Eggsy feels bad for him now. It's an awkward situation for everyone involved. 

“Not on my account, mate,” Eggsy says quickly, raising his glass and plastering on a smirk.

“No, don't leave.” Jim's voice is quieter than before. Eggsy preferred the confident flirting tone. “We'll just, let's got to a booth.”

He doesn't say goodbye to Eggsy as he gets up and turns away with Navy Tie Guy. 

It's fine. Eggsy didn't mean to pick anyone up tonight anyway.

–

Eggsy strikes up a bit of conversation with the bartender. She's at Starfleet Academy, too, medical track – and how Eggsy managed to forgot the world-famous academy was based in San Francisco is a mystery to him. He blames the mission he only finished up an hour ago. 

She's nice enough, sarcastic, and funny, and she makes a mean cocktail. Still, Eggsy can't help the way his eyes keep flitting over to where Jim and his date are seated in a booth near the back entrance, facing each other.

Eggsy isn't prone to wishful thinking, so he doesn't think he's imagining the way Jim keeps almost but not quite rolling his eyes. He can clearly see where he'd picked at his beer bottle's label until it's hanging off in pieces. The bourbon is long gone by now. 

Just as Eggsy pays for his drinks – and Jim's earlier bourbon as well, just because – he notices the guy getting up and leaving in the direction of the bathroom out of the corner of his eyes. 

“Have a good night,” Christine says.

Technically, the way out doesn't lead by the booth Jim is now sitting alone in. 

Eggsy has never cared much about 'technically'.

“Going well?” he asks, leaning against the table, making sure he doesn't sound unkind or like he's trying to make fun of Jim.

Jim quirks a half-grin. “Not really. I ditched this really hot English guy for some idiot who thinks he's God's gift to mankind.”

Meeting his eyes, Eggsy smiles, and decides to take the plunge: “Your lucky day, then. Hot English guy is a big believer in second chances.” He tilts his head towards the front door of the bar. “Wanna get out of here?”

–

For a few minutes, they toy with the idea of going to another bar; Jim, being a student in this city, apparently knows them all. 

Then Eggsy mentions he hasn't seen the Golden Gate Bridge from up close, having only arrived in the city this morning, and that settles that.

They decide to walk, even though it's well over an hour away by foot.

In the end, it feels like it took ten minutes, all told. He asks Jim questions about life at Starfleet and carefully evades any inquiries about what he does in return, by falling back on his 'it's classified' joke. Which, actually, it is. 

“I'm almost done,” Jim says, head tilted backwards to stare up at the sky. “I mean, it's another six months, yeah, but – then I'll be up there.”

Eggsy has never much cared about the stars but he really does like the way their magic makes Jim's voice sound, awed and like he's aching to go home. Like his home is among the stars. 

“Command, right? So you're gonna be everyone's boss?”

Jim looks back at Eggsy, face washed out by the yellow light of the street lamps. They're nearing the beach now, and the streets are getting quieter.

“Not quite yet,” Jim says. “But eventually, yeah.”

“You're probably good at telling everyone what to do,” Eggsy teases.

“What's that supposed to mean? That you think I'd look hot in command gold?”

Eggsy hadn't even known command wore gold, though he's seen the Starfleet uniforms before, of course. Jim would look hot in any of the bright colours.

“Maybe. Or maybe you just seem the type to like bossing people around.”

Instead of getting offended, or teasing back, or anything else verbal – Jim puts his arm around Eggsy's waist and draws him close, so that they're walking side by side, pressed closed together. It takes a few steps to coordinate themselves so they don't trip over each other's feet.

“You smell like – Is that Pineapple?”

Eggsy turns his head towards Jim and demonstratively breathes in the general direction of Jim's nose. “Think so, yeah. Christine makes fucking amazing cocktails.”

Jim laughs and breathes back at Eggsy, even though he only smells like regular beer, and only the tiniest bit.

A few minutes later, they walk onto the sandy beach, the Golden Gate imposing and tall to their left. They stop.

“So? Does it look like on all the postcards?”

Eggsy shrugs, jostling Jim's arm with the movement. “Don't know. Never seen any. Never really cared much about the States growing up in England.”

Stepping in front of Eggsy, Jim slides his other arm around his waist, too, effectively holding him in a loose hug.

“You should've. We have some nice sights.”

Eyes firmly on Jim's blue ones, ignoring the bridge he doesn't give a single damn about, Eggsy says, “Yeah. You do.”

Jim has this way of smirking with only the corner of his mouth. It's – something. Eggsy doesn't quite have words to describe what it feels like to cause such a smirk. 

“Seven out of ten. Nice delivery,” Jim comments.

“Everyone's a critic these days.”

They both laugh quietly. 

The bright and colourful lights of the bridge reflects off Jim's bright hair. 

“So,” Jim says, pausing. “Wanna make out?”

Eggsy huffs another laugh. “Why don't you just do it instead of asking? You don't exactly seem like the shy type” he asks, which means yes, please. Of course he wants to.

“See,” Jim says, moving closer. He's an expert at this, but Eggsy's no slouch either, and he licks his lips, watches Jim track the movement of his tongue. 

“Now you're imagining it,” Jim continues. “What it would be like if I kissed you. What it would taste like. Feel like. And that air of anticipation? I really like that.”

He's so close now that Eggsy has to tilt his head to the side so their noses won't bump into each other.

“See,” Eggsy echoes. “Now you're definitely overdoing it. Five out of ten.”

Before Jim can retort, Eggsy closes the gap between them.

– 

Harry is always telling Eggsy that he's smart, that he just needs to live up to his full potential. So Eggsy does the smart thing: He delights in getting to kiss and touch Jim for over an hour before finally telling him that he's only here for the night, that he'll be on the first flight back to London come morning. 

Jim checks his watch and frowns. Then he draws a hand through the sand they're now sitting on because standing upright became tiring after a while.

Eggsy's lips are tingling and isn't that just ridiculous.

“I mean,” Jim says, looking up again. He doesn't look happy at all but the prominent frown disappears after a moment, “I've never had never-gonna-see-each-other-again sex. On a beach, no less. How about you?”

Eggsy thinks back to some of his missions. He raises his eyebrows and shrugs.

“No way!” Jim says. “You did? You just ruined my whole come-on.”

“Well,” Eggsy says slowly. “It wasn't on a beach, last time. So. Still works.”

Moving closer, Jim puts his hand on Eggsy's waist again. “Good enough for me.”

–

“Is this a one time thing? You being here, I mean,” Jim says, pulling his shirt over his head, and lying next to Eggsy again. 

Eggsy has sand everywhere. Everywhere. There's sand between his toes. It's irritating.

“You never said why you're here anyway.”

Rolling onto his side, Eggsy pulls Jim into an embrace by his shoulder.

It's stupid, is what it is. Reckless. A violation of a dozen rules. (Why does the voice in his head sound like Merlin, he wonders.)

He says it anyway: “I did say it. Secret agent. On a mission. Well, actually, not anymore, I wrapped it up earlier today.”

Jim is curiously still, not meeting his eyes but instead firmly staring at Eggsy's chest. He hasn't put his shirt back on yet. It's not cold, not in comparison to typical London weather. 

“Are you bullshitting me?” Jim asks eventually. 

The breath Eggsy lets out is careful and controlled. “No. I already got into your pants, so there's no point, is there?”

Jim's gaze flicks up and to Eggsy's face. “I'm pretty good at sex,” he states matter-of-factly. “You might be angling for another round.”

“Give me another hour and I will be. But. I'm also really a secret agent. Sometimes I have missions in the US, yeah. Sometimes even in San Francisco, but – I don't know. It's not very reliable. You guys have your own secret agency and you don't call for our help at every turn.”

In the darkness, Jim's eyes look more grey than blue. 

“We should.”

Eggsy doesn't have a reply and Jim seems like doesn't quite believe him yet, so Eggsy waits.

“Fuck,” Jim whispers finally and laughs. “Maybe you're crazy. Maybe I am.” 

“Speak for yourself,” Eggsy teases very gently. “I'm telling the truth.”

“Fuck,” Jim says again. 

– 

“You know,” Jim says, now sitting up, burying his toes in the cold, dark sand. “I always pretended I was a secret agent when I was small. George – that's my older brother – and I, we'd always watch these old James Bond movies.”

Jim isn't looking at him. Eggsy doesn't know which way to go – should he apologise? Reassure Jim he's telling the truth? Make a joke about it?

“I would've thought you've been wanting to go to into space since you were small,” he says instead. “And it's not really like in the movies. At least, not all the time.”

The corners of Jim's mouth quirk up slightly, an approximation of a grin. “Except when you get to sleep with the Bond girl of the week on a beach.”

“Except for that, yeah,” Eggsy agrees. He's slept with people on missions, of course he has. Sometimes he even has to, for the missions themselves. To extract information from them. 

It's never quite been like this.

Silence falls over them. After a moment, Eggsy moves closer to Jim until they're pressed together from shoulder to toes. 

He's about to say something about it being chilly when Jim speaks up again, “I never liked space as a kid.” He grins again as he turns to meet Eggsy's eyes, but it looks hollow. “Guess the whole my dad dying up there thing kinda turned me off. Or maybe I just thought James Bond was really cool.”

Theoretically, Eggsy should have some experience on how to deal with dead fathers. Especially, the fathers that died for something you yourself are now aspiring to become. The way it sometimes tastes like betrayal to yourself, ten years ago and angry and swearing to never ever become like your dad. 

It's a bit like a very swift punch to the gut to realise that Eggsy's and Jim's stories are eerily similar in that matter. 

Eggsy doesn't have a reply, though. He doesn't know what to say. It doesn't even seem like Jim wants comfort, really. 

“I'm gonna kiss you again,” Eggsy's brain comes up with before he has a chance to reconsider whether it's a smart thing to say in the situation. Not that he reconsiders his words all that often, even when he has ample time.

Surprisingly, Jim throws his head back and laughs. It sounds real and like it's taking him by surprise, too. “Trying to distract me with sex? You're my kinda guy.”

Eggsy puts an arm around Jim's shoulders to pull him closer. 

“That's a yes, right?”

–

They don't end up having sex again. They fool around and then talk. Jim is hilarious and a bit of an asshole from the stories he tells, but in the good way, in the way that makes Eggsy feel alive and less flawed himself. Or, like he's flawed and that's alright because Jim is, too.

After an hour or two, they walk back to the Starfleet campus. Everything is shining and gleaming and it's such a stark contrast to anything Kingsman – where traditions trumps modern design at most turns, except for when it comes to weapons.

They head into Jim's room just long enough to extract a bottle of Jim Beam and a bottle of coke, trying hard not to giggle in order to let Jim's roommate, Bones, sleep. He has a hospital shift in the morning, Jim says, and he's a grumpy bastard when woken up. 

When they sit down by an empty fountain not far from Jim's dorms, Jim pours half of the coke in the half-empty bottle of Jim Beam and hands it to Eggsy.

“You're a terrible agent. Not stealthy at all,” Jim says.

“I'd like to see you tiptoe when you're drunk and _someone_ just grabs your ass out of nowhere.” He could have been stealthy through all that, of course. He's trained. But being giggly and clumsy with Jim had simply been more fun. The roommate hadn't woken up, in any case.

Eggsy takes a swig and makes a face. He hasn't had badly mixed alcohol in ages, not since before he joined Kingsman where Harry taught him what a good drink is.

“I can't be held responsible for that,” Jim says and grins cheekily. “In fact, I'd say that's your fault. Your ass' fault, actually.”

“I'm not even going to rate that come-on because it was piss-poor.”

Jim laughs and takes the bottle from Eggsy. 

Having expected Jim to take a sip himself, Eggsy – well, he doesn't startle but he is taken by surprise when Jim leans forward to lick the corner of his mouth.

“You had a little something there,” Jim explains afterwards, inches from his face.

Eggsy lets out a puff of air in amusement. “How do you ever get laid? You're actually getting worse.”

Putting the bottle down between them, Jim buries his now free hand in Eggsy's short hair, at the base of his neck. 

“I don't know what you're talking about. It's working quite well, from where I'm sitting.”

Eggsy settles his hand on Jim's waist. “That's because I'm amazing at seducing people. Brilliant. Gifted, some would say.”

“So you're saying it's all on you?” Jim asks. “Because I'm quite sure I hit on you first.”

He's still very close. Eggsy wonders what picture they make, if any of the security cameras are recording them right now.

“Because you thought I was someone else and --”

“Because you're hot!”

“--and,” Eggsy continues as if Jim hadn't interrupted, “I was the one who got you out of the bar, so. I'm the one who pulled.”

Jim lets the argument slide in favour of kissing Eggsy and really, Eggsy has no complaints about that.

–

It's strangely anti-climatic, the time leading up to Eggsy leaving. Mostly, it's because they suddenly notice it's only an hour and a half before Eggsy's flight leaves, having lost track of time. Eggsy hasn't even been back to his hotel yet to collect his bag and clothes, so that's where they hurry first: running, because Jim says it's faster than taking public transport. 

Breathing heavily, they meet eyes in the lift on the way up to Eggsy's room and promptly burst out laughing. For a strange moment, Eggsy wants to tell Jim to go back to his dorm – wants nothing as much as to avoid having to say goodbye at the airport. 

Why the idea of it is so painful, Eggsy has no idea.

Then the door opens and Jim's halfway down the floor before Eggsy gathers his wits enough to move.

Inside, Eggsy starts hastily throwing clothes into his bags as Jim rushes into the bathroom to collect whatever Eggsy left there.

“You weren't lying,” Jim says, suddenly, his voice strangely calm in the midst of the hectic. 

“What?” Eggsy asks back, distracted. 

After a moment, Jim steps back into the room. He's holding Eggsy's toothbrush and his hair mousse in one hand, and a rather small handgun in the other.

“You don't use phasers?” Jim asks, eyes downcast at the gun. He looks like he's never seen one which might well be true; Starfleet operates exclusively with phasers.

“We do, but we've got these, too,” Eggsy says, holding his hand out for the gun. “Sometimes it's – more effective.” And bloodier, he doesn't add.

“You gotta teach me how to shoot, man,” Jim says, somewhat inanely, considering that Eggsy is soon going to be half a world away.

Jim hands him the gun and Eggsy tucks it safely away. 

“Only if you promise to keep your hands off my ass,” Eggsy shoots back.

His only response is Jim letting out a breathy puff of laughter.

Without giving the room a last glance to see if he missed something, Eggsy opens the door and leaves, Jim at his heels. 

–

The line at security isn't particularly long – and Eggsy knows how to skip it, in any case – but if Eggsy wants to make the plane, he has to go through security now, if not five minutes ago.

He really hates having to go on regular flights as opposed to private Kingsman ones. But the end of a mission isn't urgent, it doesn't warrant a private flight. Plus, it keeps Eggsy humble, at least according to Merlin.

Right now it's just frustrating.

“Listen--,” Jim says, suddenly, in a rush as he hands Eggsy his small bag. He hadn't been in the US long enough to justify a proper suitcase, so all he has is his carry-on. “I'm-- I don't know.”

It's strange, seeing Jim at a loss for words. Eggsy hasn't known him long, but still.

“These things never work out, do they?”

Eggsy considers asking for clarification but he doesn't want to. He doesn't have the time to, either.

“No,” he says, “They don't.”

Long distance sucks. The life Eggsy is living doesn't help, either.

And the point remains – they've only known each other since last night. Attempting to build a long distance something – relationship? – on that is ridiculous.

“Okay.” Jim's eyes flick towards the security line.

“Alright,” Eggsy says, even though by now he's going to have to run through the airport to get to his gate on time. It doesn't matter.

Eggsy takes a small step back, unsure of what's appropriate now. A hug? A kiss? He's never had that problem before.

“Good,” Jim says and yanks Eggsy towards him again by his wrist. “I put my comm number in your bag earlier.”

Eggsy can't help grinning at that. What is Jim even saying? That it's never gonna work out, but they should try and give it a go, anyway?

“With that kind of stealth, you should be a secret agent.”

Jim looks like he's going to laugh, but Eggsy cuts him off by pressing a firm kiss to his lips.

Now he's really going to have to skip the damn line.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's so close to the screen that Eggsy can clearly see that his eyes are hazel. His hair looks black in the low lightning of their dorm room.
> 
> “What the hell happened to your face?” he demands to know. “You don't have dermal regenerators over in England?”
> 
> Eggsy squints. He'd successfully bypassed the doctors at the end of the mission briefing. He had honestly forgotten that Jim's roommate is a doctor. Not that he'd expected to meet him tonight. 
> 
> “No,” Eggsy replies. “We live on trees.”
> 
> Jim snorts and Bones frowns even more deeply.

The first time Harry walks in on Eggsy and Jim skyping, Eggsy's shirt is off and Jim is trying to sweet-talk him into taking his pants off as well.

Jim himself is in boxer shorts already, unashamed and grinning widely.

“I don't live alone,” Eggsy reminds him but fuck – Jim's just grinning at him and it looks like a wink and Eggsy just wants to touch him all over.

“Neither do I.” 

As if on cue, the door to Eggsy's room in Harry's house opens, Harry now standing in the doorway.

Jim really is frying Eggsy's brain cells. He should have heard him coming.

“Back from your mission already?” Eggsy asks cheekily because there's no way to salvage this now. Jim looks to be choking on silent laughter, his cheeks and ears a bright red.

“Ah,” Harry says, not stepping further into the room. “James Tiberius Kirk, I presume?”

Jim's eyes go wide. “You told him about me?!” 

Eggsy grabs his discarded shirt from the floor and pulls it over his head. Jim is still in just his boxer shorts.

“Yeah, 'course.” He'd actually told Roxy first and his mum second, then Harry and Merlin.

“It's a pleasure to meet you,” Harry says calmly.

“Yeah, sure. Nice to meet you.”

Eggsy prays that Jim won't mention anything related to Kingsman. No one but Roxy knows that Eggsy told Jim everything. 

Someone up there must be listening because Harry soon excuses himself.

Eggsy watches him close the door carefully and then turns back around to the screen.

True to form, Jim bursts out laughing again. “I fucking hate this,” he says, breathless, and that's what sets Eggsy off, too.

–

Meeting Jim's roommate Bones for the first time happens soon after. It's nothing like Harry walking in on them.

Having just gotten home from a mission with Roxy, the skin around his left eye feeling tight and bruised, with a split lip to boot, Eggsy had wanted nothing but to curl up in bed with JB and go straight to sleep. He's been awake for the past two days, at least, and he's bone-tired.

As he gets through the front door and heavily makes his way up the stairs, he texts Jim to let him know that he made it back home, safe and sound. 

The night light next to Eggsy's head is still on and JB is just settling in next to his shoulders when, of course, Jim calls. It's a video call.

Eggsy accepts.

Jim's face comes into view, mouth set in a straight line as he catalogues Eggsy's visible injuries. He never says anything about them. Instead, he acts as if getting banged up from time to time is a normal part of life. 

Having heard as much about Jim's childhood as he had, Eggsy could see why he'd come to that conclusion. Not that he'd heard all that much about it, after all. 

“Hi there,” Jim says, finally. “Just got up, especially for you. It's not even 6 yet.”

Eggsy usually knows what time it is in San Francisco but currently, he's not even sure whether it's day or night in London. 

He makes a sound that he hopes vaguely resembles a greeting.

“Everything go alright?” Jim asks.

Eggsy can't reveal any details, of course, so he just nods. No one had died, in the end, not even their targets, which marks a good day in Eggsy's book. It's not often they manage to detain someone rather than shoot them. It's not often they're allowed to.

Someone that's not Jim grumbles on the other end, low and far away from where Jim is sitting at the desk.

“Go back to sleep, Bones,” Jim calls over his shoulder.

There's shuffling and Jim telling his roommate to get back to sleep once more, before said roommate – Bones – finally comes into view.

“You the elusive boyfriend?” he asks, frowning.

Eggsy is about to answer, though he isn't sure what, when quite suddenly, Bones leans forward. He's so close to the screen that Eggsy can clearly see that his eyes are hazel. His hair looks black in the low lightning of the dorm room.

“What the hell happened to your face?” he demands to know. “You don't have dermal regenerators over in England?”

Eggsy squints. He'd successfully bypassed the doctors at the end of the mission briefing. He had honestly forgotten that Jim's roommate is a doctor. Not that he'd expected to meet him tonight. 

“No,” Eggsy replies. “We live on trees.”

Jim snorts and Bones frowns even more deeply.

“Very funny, kid. You got one at home or not? That one's gonna bruise real nasty. You'll be lucky if it doesn't swell shut.”

Eggsy shrugs, dislocating JB slightly. He's taken to hiding underneath the duvet and doesn't move an inch.

“Don't think Harry's got one.”

“Well,” Bones says. “Get some ice, then. Jesus, is this the dark ages?”

Jim laughs again. 

“That's Bones, by the way,” he says.

“It's Leonard.”

Eggsy smiles groggily, content to watch them banter.

“ _Bones_ ,” Jim intones. “That's Eggsy.”

“Damnit, you and your stupid nicknames. What's your real name, kid? Go get some ice.”

Bones turns towards the screen again, now having moved farther away, to stand next to where Jim's sitting.

“Eggsy,” he says just because. 

Bones rolls his eyes. “Go get some ice,” he says, slower now, like Eggsy is a child.

“He won't get off your case until you do,” Jim pipes up, smiling softly. 

“I hate both of you,” Eggsy says, tired but amused. “I'm gonna hang up.”

Jim and Bones watch as Eggsy rolls out of bed like he's a hundred years old and go to get an ice packet from the kitchen. 

“Don't just press it against your face!” Bones protests as Eggsy does exactly that, squinting in the low light that his phone screen provides. “Get a towel. Jesus, kid.”

Eggsy makes a face, half of it covered by the ice packet.

“I thought you only called me kid,” Jim protests, obviously on the verge of laughter.

Eggsy retrieves a white towel from a drawer and covers the ice packet in it before pressing it to his face again. He makes his way back up.

“I didn't know someone was as foolish as you until now,” Bones replies.

“Can I call you Bones, too, then?” Eggsy mumbles as he slides back into bed. JB immediately crawls closer to the heat Eggsy provides and falls back asleep. Eggsy arranges the ice on his face, then lets his hand drop.

“No,” Bones growls. “Jim isn't supposed to call me that, either.”

Eggsy nods heavily. “'kay, Bones.”

“Go to sleep.” 

Eggsy looks over at Jim. “Think I'm gonna. Sleep well, love.”

Jim smiles the way he always does when Eggsy calls him that, a little embarassed. This time there's a flicker of his eyes towards Bones, too. 

“Text me later,” Jim says.

“Keep that ice on,” Bones adds.

“You better. He'll know if you don't.”

Eggsy only just manages to blow something vaguely resembling a kiss in the direction of the camera. He closes the app, lets the phone drop down on his chest, and is out like a light.

–

As Jim and Bones slowly enter finals week, it becomes more and more common for Bones to join their video calls, frantically studying in the background, or worrying about his grades, or complaining about the noise when he's trying to nap at three in the afternoon.

On the last day of their exams Eggsy calls Jim while he's sitting in headquarters, bored out of his mind. He's supposed to familiarise himself with some new weapons but he'd already gotten to practise with the tie that doubles as a phaser, when Roxy had her introduction to it. Naturally, she'd kicked his ass at the shooting range.

It's Bones who picks up.

“Why the hell do Andorians have that many livers,” he asks, not even looking at Eggsy. “It's unnecessary. Just in case they lose one! That's ridiculous.”

“Hi Bones,” Eggsy says, smiling. 

Bones' hair is standing up in places like he'd been running his hair through it for the past hour. He doesn't even correct Eggsy's use of the nickname.

“Jim's sitting – I don't fucking know what. Some stupid exam, asking question that won't help anyone actually out in the field.”

“You doing okay?” Eggsy asks just for fun. It's pretty clear he's not doing okay. “Jim always says your grades are brilliant. Never been the academic type, so I wouldn't know.”

“Kid doesn't know anything, never listen to him.”

Bones finally puts down the PADD he'd held up and scrolled through frantically the entire time to look at Eggsy.

“You okay? Anyone try to beat you up recently?”

Bones, of course, doesn't know what Eggsy does for a living. All he knows is that Eggsy is bruised more than even Jim, and that he hates it. With passion.

“Yeah, but I kicked their asses into next week.”

Rolling his eyes, Bones drops his head onto his hand.

“The two of you will bring me into an early grave. I'm naming my first grey hair after Jim, the second one after you.”

Eggsy laughs. “How much coffee have you had?”

Bones squints, clearly trying to recall. “A few.”

Eggsy knows Jim's schedule by heart and, somehow, Bones', too. He knows that his last exam starts in an hour.

“I'll let you get back to it,” he says. “Good luck, don't kill anyone.”

“Wait,” Bones says, leaning forward. “I was going to ask you something but – Jim asked me to keep it secret but I really do have to ask you about it.”

Eggsy frowns. He doesn't like talking behind Jim's back like this but now he's curious. “What is it? Is he alright?”

“Yeah,” Bones reassures quickly. He's probably familiar with the feeling of worrying about Jim Kirk. “It's just – see, the kid wants to surprise visit you. I'm not saying when, don't even ask me! And he bought me a ticket, too, which is _insane_ , and I told him I won't come, I'm not disturbing your little lover's reuinion. But he won't listen and we keep arguing about it and –“

It all comes out in a rush. Eggsy is fairly sure Bones wouldn't have confessed the surprise to him if he hadn't been on some kind of coffeine high. 

“Just tell me I shouldn't come.”

Eggsy can't answer right away – he's too happy, ecstatic for a moment. Seeing Jim again is something he'd wanted for months now! There had never been time for it, not for a proper visit. Eggsy wanted more time with him than when they had when they first met. He wanted days, not just nights.

At the same time, he wouldn't mind meeting Bones in person, not at all. It's not like he has to join in on their happy reuinion sex, right?

“You should stop arguing with him and just come, Bones.”

Bones sighs, shoulders sagging. Eggsy can't tell if it's relief or surprise. But then, he smiles. Eggsy hasn't seen Bones smile often, or maybe not at all, he doesn't know.

“Stop calling me that,” he says, still smiling.

Eggsy smiles back, letting his head rest against the wall where he's sitting on the floor with the ties next to him. 

“Sure thing, Bones.”

–

Roxy hands him his beer, then drops down on the other side of the small table. She takes a sip of her own pint, then asks, “So, how's it going?”

“Kicked a governor's ass today, then took out his brother. Pretty damn well, I'd say.”

Rolling her eyes, Roxy puts her glass back down. “I know. I was 3 feet from you, defusing a bomb.”

“And pretty damn expertedly you did that, love. How much time did you have left? Two seconds?”

“Please,” she says, clinking her glass against his when he raises it in a toast. “Almost a whole minute.”

Eggsy downs almost half his pint at once and watches Roxy watch him.

“What I meant was how it's going with Jim.”

Eggsy shrugs. “Better than I thought.”

Roxy smiles. “Meaning, you miss him like hell and it fucking sucks.”

There's really no need to confirm her guess because she's well aware it's true. 

It's wonderful, really. It feels like he's known Jim since forever, the way they click instantly. He loves their texting, loves the selfies Jim sends constantly, loves their video calls. It's especially fun when Bones joins in, the three of them bantering and teasing each other easily. 

It just 'fucking sucks' that Eggsy's constantly calculating whether Jim is awake or in class or doing homework. That he can't ever tell him details about the missions because the connection might not be secure; not getting to touch him. Not even in the sexual sense, necessarily. Although he doess miss sex a lot, too. It's just that growing up Eggsy had always expected being in love to mean falling asleep next someone every night, among other things.

That's not happening, though, and sometimes it really, really sucks.

“He's coming for a visit sometime soon,” Eggsy says. “So, yeah. Not all bad, you know.”

“Do't you dare not introduce him to me, then. I've been preparing a whole protective big sister speech.”

Eggsy laughs, feeling fondness bubble up in his chest. “You're not my sister! And you're younger than me.”

“It's really good, too. I'm gonna casually clean my gun while I talk to him, you know. Just so he knows what he's in for if he's not careful with you.”

“You really don't have to do that.”

Roxy empties her pint and smiles at Eggsy again. “Who else is gonna do it? Besides, you sometimes seem tougher than you are, Eggsy. You're really a big softie at heart. Jim might not realise that yet, so I'm making sure he doesn't fuck up.”

When Eggsy doesn't reply right away and avoids her eyes, embarrassed, she laughs and gets up to get them another round. “See? Got that embarrassing you thing down. I'm most certainly your big sister, love.”

“I'm extremely tough. I'm motherfucking James Bond,” Eggsy replies, drawing another laugh from Roxy.

–

“Show me your surprised face,” Bones demands, leaning forwards in his desk chair.

Eggsy can't help the laughter that spills out of him. 

“He's gonna figure it out if you don't seem surprised enough, kid. Jim's not stupid!”

“When are you coming?” Eggsy asks.

“Not telling. Come on, show me.”

Eggsy widens his eyes, drops his mouth open in exaggarated shock and lets out a high-pitched, “Jim!” 

Bones shakes his head but he's grinning. “Great, he's gonna kick my ass just because you can't take anything seriously.”

In response, Eggsy pitches his voice even higher, claps his hands over his mouth and squeaks, “What are you doing here, Jim?!”

–

On the 4th of January, Eggsy makes sure he's not needed in headquarters or on missions. He's not entirely sure how to approach Jim's birthday. Bones had tipped him off that Jim doesn't like his birthday, so Eggsy hadn't bought him a present. 

Not acknlowledging it at all feels wrong, though. It's Jim's _birthday_. Eggsy is thankful that Jim was born, no matter the circumstances. 

Knowing there's no way Jim is awake yet, Eggsy works out in Harry's gym room, takes a shower and has a late breakfast. Afterwards, he cuddles up with JB on the couch. It's only after their midday walk that Eggsy figures Jim might be waking up soon.

He takes a selfie with his muddy dog, himself grinning into the camera, and sends it to Jim. The attached text reads “JB says happy birthday!” with the dog emoji and a bunch of hearts.

He figures it's safe enough without ignoring the occasion entirely.

Jim doesn't answer. After about half an hour, he opens the text, the status changing to 'read', but there's no reply. He doesn't even start typing and then stops.

Instead, he just ignores it.

Eggsy isn't going to be mad about it. He's not going to give up, either. 

He sends Jim a bunch more pictures, of bathing JB and of his lunch, and of himself grinning goofily and wearing his Kingsmann glasses, simply because Jim once said he liked the glasses.

They all go ignored. 

–

It's noon and Jim is wasted. His vodka bottle is empty but that's alright, he brought scotch with him, too. Who cares about not mixing your liquids, really?

His stomach's been through worse.

He doesn't feel wasted enough, yet. The happy, loose feeling's just not there. He feels numb, but not numb enough, either. There's still that huge empty feeling in his gut. There's still his mind telling him 'you're not doing enough you're not enough your dad died for nothing you'll never be enough' over and over. 

And over and over.

He drops the empty vodka bottle down onto the grass next to him. 

His comm vibrates again. It's Eggsy. Jim groans and fumbles for where it's lying next to his knee. It takes a few tries but finally he manages to open the picture of Eggsy in a silly, bright green cooking apron reading “kiss the cook”, preparing what looks like dinner. 

Jim wants nothing more than to tell Eggsy to fuck off. He doesn't want to talk to him, doesn't want to see him or anyone. 

He's got the right to wallow in his misery once a year, fucking hell. 

Instead, he takes his first swig of the scotch, savouring the way it burns all the way down to his throat. Then he places it next to his empty vodka bottle and takes a picture. It's blurry as all hell – or that might just be Jim's drunk vision. The bottles are still easily identifiable, so Jim sends it.

He snorts to himself. It's artistic. Or something like that.

His comm vibrates again but this time Eggsy's sent a text. Jim squints at the screen but it's too much effort to make out the words.

Grabbing for his scotch again, just to hold it in his hand, Jim drops the comm first and then himself to lie down on the cold grass.

Doesn't matter. The alcohol will warm him. 

–

“A fucking graveyard,” Bones rumbles. “That's morbid, even for you.”

Jim turns his head slightly to the side, his vision following seconds after his head's already made the movement. That's his favourite state of being drunk.

He frowns at Bones.

Bones doesn't look at him. He's putting some kind of blanket on the grass, then sits down on top of it. He tugs it around until Jim's head is on top of it, too, right next to Bones' right thigh.

Still without speaking a word, Bones puts down a full bottle of bourbon, makes a grab for Jim's empty vodka bottle and uses it to prop up a PADD against it.

Eggsy's on the screen, not saying a word either. He doesn't look as smiley and happy as he did in the pictures earlier but that might just be Jim's drunk inability to see him clearly. 

There's some kind of bottle in front of Eggsy, too. Jim has no idea what it is. 

“How'd you find me?” Jim asks, concentrating hard to get his words out in the right order.

“Next time consider turning off your damn comm if you don't wanna be found, kid,” Bones says, shifting slightly to look down on him. Jim's gaze is fixed on Eggsy on the screen. “It's got a locator.”

Jim knew that, he thinks. He's not stupid – he could build his very own comm out of scraps, if he had to. So he must have known it, prior to getting wasted, at least.

Bones' thigh seems to be radiating warmth, so Jim shifts closer. 

“Hi Jim,” Eggsy says finally, after what seems like ages. 

Jim feels very drunk and he's getting tired now, worn out from doing virtually nothing but steadily getting more wasted all day. He gives Eggsy what's supposed to be a smile but feels and most likely looks like a grimace.

Fuck it. He doesn't have to be happy right now. Even if seeing Eggsy does make him feel – not happy, not right now. Less awful.

“Mind if we join?” Eggsy asks but he's already uncapping his bottle of whatever. 

No one congratulates him. Or pities him. They don't even toast each other.

It's mainly like before. Only, Jim drinks less now because it's too complicated while lying down. Only, it's a little less lonely.

–

Eggsy lets out a sigh of relief when he gets Jim's text the next day: 

_'bones won't let me have anti-hangover meds am dying'_

Merlin raises his eyebrows at him. 

“Am I boring you?”

Eggsy gives him a shrug and a cheeky smile that worsens the throbbing in his own head slightly. He hadn't even drunk that much. He's just not used to it anymore, hasn't really gotten properly drunk since starting Kingsman – with the exception of the night he met Jim. Then, of course, he'd been too damn happy to ever truly feel or mind the inevitable hangover.

Now he's just relieved that Jim seems to be back to normal. 

Without ever taking his eyes off Merlin as he briefs him on some updated security protocols, Eggsy shoots off two quick texts.

_'im already dead, come join me in hell' to Jim._

A bunch of thumbs-up emojis and ' _owe you one!!_ ' to Bones. After all, Bones had been the one to not only track Jim down but to decide that Eggsy deserved to be with Jim, even if it was only via video chat.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What do you mean, Bones?” he asks, false innocence thick in his voice.
> 
> “I'm trying to have breakfast in peace.” Bones pulls his coffee closer to him. He'd successfully raided the shelves for the biggest possible mug and filled it with black coffee.
> 
> Apparently he's not functional in the morning without it. He's grumpy all times of the day, with or without the coffee, though. Eggsy enjoys it thoroughly.
> 
> “Without you two touching all over the damn place,” Bones adds after a sip of coffee.

Eggsy hates when missions go wrong.

It could have gone a lot worse, he knows that. He's not substantially hurt, apart from a few scratches that he barely notices. His cover wasn't blown. 

Still. The mark had gotten away. And that irks Eggsy more than anything else.

He's supposed to be good at this. 

“Sometimes missions just go wrong,” Merlin says at the end of the debriefing. 

Eggsy doesn't answer as he stands up. In a way, he wishes Harry was here. He'd know the right thing to say to reassure him. But he doesn't want Harry to know Eggsy's a failure, either. 

Merlin claps him on the shoulder. “Go home, Eggsy.”

Eggsy does, texting Jim his frustration on the way. He can't go into details on a non-secure channel, so he just complains about “work” having gone terribly today.

Then, for good measure, he texts Bones too, because Bones is brilliant at being grumpy. He can be grumpy about the world with Eggsy. 

Neither of them answer. It's late morning in San Francisco so they're probably in their classes or in training simulations. 

When he gets home, he hears noises coming from the kitchen. He's just taken off his shoes and crossed the hallway, with the goal to get his room without Harry noticing so he can sulk in peace, when Harry calls out, “Eggsy? Come in here for a moment, please.”

Eggsy tries not to curse but can't help making a face.

He expects to walk in to Harry having a cup of tea and reading the newspaper as is his standard afternoon ritual. 

The tea is there. Only, there are three cups. And Jim. And Bones.

Having tea with Harry.

Eggsy stops dead in the doorway.

“What are you doing here?” he asks and he doesn't even have to fake his surprise. He _is_ surprised. He'd expected – he's not sure what he had expected. Maybe to be surprised at headquarters or for Jim to just knock on the front door one day. Not for him to be sitting in the kitchen with Bones and Harry, having tea.

He doesn't get an answer. Instead he gets Jim launching himself out of his chair and at Eggsy with so much force that he stumbles back a few steps.

It's way, way better than an answer anyway. His arms go around Jim's waist automatically, pulling him in even closer.

“Surprise!” Jim whispers and then kisses the side of Eggsy's neck. It's an unexpectedly chaste and soft kiss.

Eggsy's heart melts at the tenderness of it.

“I can't fucking believe you're here,” Eggsy says. He'd known it would happen. But he hadn't quite believed, after all. Had almost forgotten the way Jim fits so perfectly against him. 

“Hah!” Jim replies. “I knew you wouldn't see it coming. Bones kept saying, you might suspect something, but I knew I'd get you!”

Jim draws back minimally so he can look at Eggsy. 

Eggsy opens his mouth to reply when Jim says, quicker now and quietly, “How rude would it be if we just fucked off to your bedroom right now?”

Eggsy laughs. Fuck, he'd barelly gotten a full night with Jim when they met and yet he'd missed him so terribly. He allows himself to press one simple kiss to Jim's lips before his eyes dart over his shoulders. 

Harry and Bones are having a quiet conversation, kindly ignoring the scene Jim and Eggsy are making.

“A gentleman always finishes his tea,” Eggsy tells Jim and drops his hand off Jim's waist.

“I'm not a gentleman,” Jim whines and Eggsy can't help but laugh again as they make their way back to the table.

Jim drops down in his seat and pulls the free chair next to him closer. Before Eggsy sits down, he stops in front of Bones.

“Hiya kid,” Bones says and gets up, holding out his hand.

Eggsy ignores the offered hand and pulls Bones into a tight hug. He'd only ever seen him in videos before and he's taller than Eggsy had expected. Broader, too, especially around the shoulders.

“Great, this one's handsy, too.” 

It's surreal, sitting in Harry's kitchen and having tea with Harry, Bones and Jim. 

Unsurprisingly, Jim is charming, even when they're just having small talk. He smiles prettily (although Eggsy may be biased on that) and doesn't let on that he knows exactly what Harry and Eggsy do for a living.

Eggsy feels like a school boy, with the way Jim and him are holding hands under the table. 

Once, Bones' gaze lands on their entwined hands and he raises an eyebrow at them. Jim doesn't notice but Eggsy throws him a cheeky wink. He can barely believe only ten minutes earlier he had been in a truly foul mood. 

Now he feels like he's flying.

–

“I should never have come,” Bones says, groaning.

At that, Jim pulls Eggsy to sit down on his lap.

“What do you mean, Bones?” he asks, false innocence thick in his voice.

“I'm trying to have breakfast in peace.” Bones pulls his coffee closer to him. He'd successfully raided the shelves for the biggest possible mug and filled it with black coffee.

Apparently he's not functional in the morning without it. He's grumpy all times of the day, with or without the coffee, though. Eggsy enjoys it thoroughly.

“Without you two touching all over the damn place,” Bones adds after a sip of coffee.

“Aww,” Eggsy says and gets up, only to drop down on Bones' lap. “Are you jealous?”

Bones looks like he just bit into a lemon. “Get off me.”

“Hey! You're my boyfriend,” Jim complains. “Come back here, _Gary_.”

Eggsy steals Jim's mug of coffee, which a dark beige rather than black and more to his taste. “Not if you call me that, _Tiberius_.”

Jim's eyes widen. “How do you know that?!” After only a second, his gaze lands on Bones. “You traitor!”

Bones doesn't respond, just tries to drink his coffee with minimal touching of Eggsy who is still sitting on his lap. It's kind of hilarious, really.

“His name's Horatio. Leonard Horatio,” Jim says to Eggsy. “Which is way worse than James Tiberius. Sounds like an old stuffy violin teacher.”

“The difference that I'm not an infant who is embarrassed of my name. Unlike you two children,” Bones says, then gently shoves at Eggsy. “Now go over to your boyfriend before he starts getting jealous. I'm not getting into the middle of this.”

–

Jim and Bones have been here for a full day before Eggsy thinks to ask, “How long are you staying?”

Jim rolls over to press his face against Eggsy's shoulder, kissing the skin there one, two, three times.

“Guess,” he says. His hair is a mess from their activities earlier already. That doesn't stop Eggsy from reaching out to mess it up more.

“A year.”

Jim's laugh is a puff of air against his shoulder.

“Little less,” Jim says.

“Another day?”

Jim moves up so his he can look at Eggsy, supporting his head on his hand, lying sideways next to him. “You're an all or nothing kinda guy, aren't you?”

Eggsy never used to have a favourite colour, but now it might just be blue.

“Maybe I am. How long are you staying?”

Jim smiles, slow and easy. 

“We just finished finals,” he begins which isn't an answer at all. Eggsy pinches his side.

“Hey! You menace. Let me finish.”

“How long. Are you. Staying.”

“That depends,” Jim replies. “As I was trying to say, we just finished finals and now we've got two free months. We normally – I mean, usually Bones picks up shifts at the hospital and I do some simulations and flight training and stuff, but we haven't anything planned this time. We haven't really booked a return flight yet, either. So,” Jim shrugs with only one shoulder, “I'll stay for as long as you'll have me. Bones, too.”

There's a beat of silence. 

Then Jim says, “You look at little manic, smiling like that. Cute, though, very cute.”

Eggsy just widens his smile. He's already considering how exactly he's going to arrange it that he's only send on short-term missions for two months. “You could've just said two months!”

Jim foregoes replying in favour of kissing. Eggsy has no complaints whatsoever.

–

Eggsy loves going to the pub with Jim and Bones. It always drives home the point that Jim is – that they both are – really here. In England. With Eggsy. 

It's all the more fun when Roxy is there, too.

“No idea what's wrong with you British people,” Bones complains as he's handed his first pint. Eggsy always get them pints for the first round, just so Bones can complain. “It's beer. It's not supposed to get you drunk.”

“Not our fault that Americans call what I'd say is water beer. There's no alcohol in it as far as I can tell,” Eggsy says. He takes a sip of his own pint. “This is real beer. I'm sure you can handle it, though.”

Bones demonstratively empties half the glass. “Trust me, kid, I can handle it.”

Roxy shakes her head, smiling. “Why do you have to have the same discussion every time?”

“It's the principle of the thing,” Bones replies just as Jim chimes in with, “For shits and giggles.”

“That clears it up, thanks so much,” Roxy says.

All around, Eggsy is pretty happy. The hand that Jim has on his thigh under the table only enhances the feeling.

That is, until he gets up to help Roxy get their next round. She waits until they're safely out of ear shot before she says, “Why are you always flirting with Leonard if Jim is your boyfriend?”

Eggsy kind of wishes he was drinking something just so he could spit it out for effect. As it is, he just stares at her disbelievingly as she leans against the bar. 

“What are you on about?”

“I'm just wondering what's going on,” Roxy says, shrugging. “It seems unusual.”

“I'm not flirting with Bones!”

“Right.” Roxy waves the bartender over to order. 

“I'm not,” Eggsy insists because he knows that tone.

Roxy shoves two glasses at him, taking the other two herself. “Alright. It doesn't look like Jim's jealous anyway, so don't worry. I was just wondering.”

After that, Eggsy tries his best not to overanalyse his behaviour but he can't help it. He feels like he's looking over at Bones every thirty seconds, so he stops, but then it feels like he's pointedly not looking at him. Which is just weird, considering they're all having a conversation. 

So Eggsy overindulges on the beer in order to relax. He follows it up with a few shots that Jim gladly participates in. 

– 

Later, as they're lying naked in bed, still a little drunk and a lot satisfied, what Roxy said creeps back into Eggsy's mind. 

He rolls onto his side and rests his head on Jim's chest. 

It's probably the alcohol still in his system that makes him say, “Do you think I flirt with Bones?”

Jim, his hand raised in the air above Eggsy's head to presumably bury it in his hair, freezes. “What?”

“No, I don't want to! I mean. I don't know. Roxy said I flirt with him! And I don't want you to think anything… that's not true.”

God, Eggsy is such a fucking mess at relationships. The only reason they've gotten this far is probably the distance. What a depressing thought. 

Slowly, Jim drops his hand on Eggsy's hair after all. He sighs. 

“I don't mind.”

Eggsy frowns and sits up to look down at Jim in the low lightening of the street lamp outside. “You don't mind? Aren't you supposed to say no, you don't think I'm flirting with Bones?”

Jim looks a little lost. He shrugs.

“You do think I'm flirting with him?”

Now Jim sits up as well. He pulls his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them. Considering that he's still naked, it's an oddly defensive posture.

“I don't mean to flirt with him,” Eggsy starts. “I didn't even realise.”

Again, Jim shrugs.

Eggsy can't tell what's going on. Is Jim mad at him? 

“I'm sorry.”

“Fuck,” Jim says. “Don't apologise. Just – don't, alright?” There's a moment of silence. Then, Jim asks, “Do you like Bones?”

“What? No!” Eggsy shoots back immediately. “Not like I like you. I like him as a friend.”

A small grin steals its way onto Jim's face. “Like you like me? How do you like me then? Do you like-like me?”

“Oh my god.” Eggsy shoves at Jim's shoulder with one hand. “Shut up.”

Jim catches Eggsy's hand off his shoulder and holds it in both of his in front of his still pulled up knees. He looks at Eggsy.

“Don't be mad at me,” he says. 

Eggsy wonders if some drunk confession is about to happen. It doesn't sound like it's going to be a good one.

“Why would I be mad at you?”

Jim squeezes Eggsy's hand, then carefully starts stroking the back of it.

“I've had feelings for Bones since… Fuck, I don't know. Since I met him, I think.”

It feels a lot like having the air crushed out of him all at once. Eggsy struggles to breathe.

“It's always been, I don't know. Nothing was ever going to come out of it, you know? He needs someone stable, someone very different from me. Someone I didn't ever think I could be.”

Eggsy wants to tell him to stop. He doesn't need to hear the details of Jim's unrequited love for Bones. Doesn't want the realisation that he's just a stand-in.

The fact that he really fucking likes Bones, too, just adds insult to injury. Of course Jim would be in love with him. Bones is fucking amazing.

“But then I met you and it was like this whirlwind. At the risk of sounding cliché, but you swept me off my feet.”

Jim shoots him a small smile but it looks strained. Eggsy has no idea what his own expression might reveal.

“And suddenly I wanted to try to be that person. For you. Even with the distance, I couldn't imagine not being with you. And it wasn't all that hard to be committed after all. Not when it's with you.”

Talk about mixed signals. Eggsy childishly wants to ask: Well? Who do you love more?

“It's just that somewhere in the back of my mind, these feelings for Bones never quite left. He'll always be something more than just my best friend to me,” Jim admits quietly. “And when you and him… do that thing. I don't know if it's flirting but I really don't mind.” Stopping the movement of his fingers on Eggsy's skin, Jim adds in almost a whisper, “I really fucking like it, actually. God, I'm fucked up, aren't I?”

Eggsy doesn't know what to reply. He doesn't have any experience with relationships, not with ones where real feelings are involved. And his feelings are really fucking real.

But this isn't right, is it? Jim isn't supposed to have feelings for someone else.

Eggsy sits up straighter. 

“So you're in love with Bones?” he asks. He already knows the answer – it doesn't make sense to ask again.

“And with you,” Jim replies without hesitation. His eyes are bright despite the dim lightening in the room.

–

Eggsy sleeps on the couch in the living room that night.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You better give me a good fucking reason for this,” Eggsy demands.
> 
> Bones looks from Eggsy to Jim and back. He shakes his head.
> 
> “Dammit. It's not you, Eggsy.”
> 
> Jim lets out a short laugh. It doesn't sound amused in the slightest. “It's not you, it's me?” he says, voice hard. “Really?”
> 
> “Fuck you, Jim,” he spits. “I'm trying to be a good friend!”

His alarm goes off at 5 in the morning. He wants to be up before anyone else so Bones and Harry won't catch him sleeping on the couch. He wouldn't know how to answer their questions or pitying looks.

As he sneaks up the stairs – quietly because a wrong breath could wake up Harry Hart and that's precisely what he's trying to avoid – he spots Jim sitting on top of them. 

Eggsy stops dead in his tracks, his pillow and blanket in one hand.

“Did you sleep?” Jim asks so quietly Eggsy has to strain to hear it.

He shakes his head. “Did you?”

Jim matches his head shake with his own.

Trudging up a few more stairs towards Jim, Eggsy wants to ask how long he's been sitting there. Has it been all night?

He doesn't quite have the words. For any of this. 

Jim gets up from his position when Eggsy reaches him. 

“I'm sorry,” he says. 

Eggsy doesn't reply, instead passes by him and makes his way back to his room, Jim following.

He almost expects Harry to open his door because their whispered conversation must surely have woken him up; he doesn't.

As Eggsy closes the bedroom door behind them, Jim speaks up again: “I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought him here.”

Eggsy lets out a long breath. He's so tired.

“I like him,” he says honestly. “I just don't know – What am I supposed to do now?”

“You're supposed to – never leave me alone in your bed again?” Jim tries to joke with a half-hearted smile. 

Eggsy drops down on said bed.

After a long pause, Jim sits down next to him, farther than Eggsy would have liked.

Eggsy considers his words, but he can't quite put together what he's feeling. He's scared that this is about to break them. Scared because – well, what if Bones returns Jim's feelings? Jim is… well, he’s _Jim_ , anyone would fall in love with him but especially his best friend who he's closer to than anyone else.

He's worried that somehow his fault, that he fucked it up without even noticing, pushed Jim towards Bones. (Jim said his feelings for Bones existed before he even met Eggsy but – doesn't that just make it worse? Eggsy hadn't even noticed.)

“Fuck,” is what he says finally. “Do you just want to go back to sleep?”

Jim looks at him for a moment, questioning. Then he grabs Eggsy's pillow and blanket from him and spreads them out on the bed.

They burrow underneath two blankets and find three more pillows in Eggsy's wardrobe, in the end. It's warm and cosy and dark and they're pressed close together.

Eggsy doesn't manage more than a light doze and he knows it's the same for Jim. So, after about two hours, after they've listened to Harry get up and walk around and finally leave the house, he says: “Do you think he thinks I'm flirting with him?”

Jim's arms tighten around his waist in surprise. 

“I don't think so. He's a bit – thick when it comes to these things,” he says, breath tickling the back of Eggsy's neck as he speaks.

That probably means 'he never notices when I do it, either'.

“I can't lose you, Eggsy,” Jim adds after a moment of silence. “It's just old feelings, you know? You're – it's different with you. My feelings for you.”

They let time tick by for a while longer yet, then Jim asks: “Can I kiss you?”

“Yeah,” is all Eggsy can say because he doesn't want to lose this – wants to lose Jim, either. Can't imagine it.

He expects Jim to sit up slightly or turn Eggsy around by his shoulders. Instead, Jim raises his head to presses warm lips to Eggsy's jaw.

He gets three, four, five more kisses, then they finally drop off.

–

Eggsy feels like he has barely slept when the door opens and Bones' voice filters through the sleepy haze: “Are you two ever gonna get up? I had breakfast an hour ago and I already walked your dog.”

Jim groans and Eggsy wholeheartedly supports that sentiment. 

“It's almost noon.” Bones sounds impatient but highly amused – it's a combination that shouldn't work but really does for him.

“Kill me,” Jim says with feeling and pulls Eggsy closer to him. His skin is sticky from sweat. Eggsy isn't any better off. It's hot in their little pillow nest.

Eggsy casts a quick look at Jim, then glances over to Bones leaning in the doorway.

He's still half-asleep so he doesn't really think too much about it when he says, “Either join us or get lost.”

Jim gasps quietly behind him and that's what brings everything back: what they had talked about last night and why they're so tired in the first place. Jim's feelings for Bones. His flirting with him.

Fuck.

Eggsy turns around to meet Jim's wide-eyed gaze just as Bones huffs and replies, “Wash off last night's sex and I'll consider it.”

Neither Jim and Eggsy have anything to say to that.

Bones tells them to get up in ten minutes “or else” and then leaves, his footsteps retreating down the stairs.

“Uh,” Jim says. “I kinda thought that was gonna stop now?”

“Yeah. I mean, I guess? Me too?”

“You did just offer him to join us in bed,” Jim reminds him.

Eggsy nods. That he did. 

“Right. Now I'm really confused,” Jim confesses.

“Yeah,” Eggsy replies. “Me too.”

– 

Eggsy can definitely see it. He can.

Bones is funny as hell, his grumpiness is more endearing than it has any right to be and, well. He's attractive. Really, really attractive. Hot, even.

Yeah, Eggsy can see why Jim would fall for him.

“Did you two finally manage to fuck each other's brains out last night?” Bones asks during their lunch, clearly irritated, after the second time Jim had flinched at being addressed. 

All Bones had said was 'Hand me the salt, kid'. And Jim had flinched.

“You wish,” Jim says with a bright grin. It doesn't really make sense as a reply and his grin is nowhere near his real one. 

“Yeah, sure.” Bones raises one eyebrow at Jim. “That's what I dream off at night. You two idiots being even more brainless than usual. Just what I need. You'd probably get yourself beaten up even more, if that's possible.”

Bones looks over at Eggsy and frowns. “Is there something on my face?”

“What?”

“Jesus. What's it with you two? You keep staring at me, Eggsy. So I'm asking if there's something fascinating on my face?”

“Maybe it's just your face I find fascinating,” Eggsy says without thinking. Again.

Bones rolls his eyes.

-

They don't get another minute alone until Bones decides to go out in the backyard with JB, to “get away from your weirdness. Hell, just go back to sleep if it helps.”

Jim watches the door fall closed behind him and turns to Eggsy. “What are you doing? You're flirting. That's flirting. Right?”

“I don't know. I think it is?”

Jim watches him with wide eyes. “I thought you were angry!”

“I'm not,” Eggsy says. He really isn't. None of it is Jim's fault, not really. And he had been fair enough to be honest about his feelings.

Eggsy appreciates that, at the very least.

“I don't know what I'm doing! Did you mean what you said? That you like it when we flirt?”

If possible, Jim's eyes get even wider. And maybe even bluer.

“Don't tell me you're doing this because you think I like it? Fucking hell, Eggsy! Don't do that!”

“That's not why I'm doing it!” It's really not – Eggsy hadn't consciously thought about his comments at all. 

Jim drags a hand through his still sleep-mussed hair. “Good. Then, why are you doing it?”

“I have no idea, I really don't.”

– 

Things go kind of back to normal for them. Eggsy flirts, Bones either flirts back or rolls his eyes, and Jim laughs about it. 

Of course, most of the time, it's Eggsy and Jim flirting shamelessly and Bones pretending to gag at their ridiculousness.

That's their kind of normal, after all. They do sometimes try and talk about what it means but neither of them is very good at it, too much confusion and too little experience clouding their thoughts. So the decide to leave it at checking on whether the other person is alright with what's happening. They figure the most important thing is that they're both fine with all of it.

Only, they hadn't considered Bones' opinion in all of it.

After about two weeks, Eggsy gets home from a short Kingsman mission. It hadn't taken up more than half a day, just an interrogation of a mark with Roxy at his side. It had felt good, actually, to get back into the job, at least for a little while. He doesn't really get restless with Jim and Bones around to keep him on his toes but he had missed the job a little bit.

He's in high spirits when he opens the front door. 

Bones' and Jim's voices are drifting down from the second floor, loud and furious and very clearly fighting. Eggsy frowns as Jim yells at Bones that he's a coward.

Taking the stairs two at once, Eggsy hurries upstairs. 

They're in Bones' room – well, Harry's guest room, really. It's just become Bones' room in Eggsy's mind. Bones is furiously tossing clothes in his suitcase that's lying open on his bed. Jim is just as furiously taking them out at again and throwing them down on the floor.

Eggsy stops dead in his tracks in the doorway. “What's going on?”

They both whirl around to face him, obviously taken aback by his sudden appearance, too wrapped up in their fight to hear him approach.

“Nothing,” Bones says tensely and throws a shirt in his suitcase.

Jim's cheeks are red. Eggsy has never seen that before. He'd just figured that Jim isn't the type to blush. Well, it seems anger does the trick better than embarrassment or anything else. 

“Bones wants to leave.” Jim's voice is accusing.

“Why?!” They're not supposed to leave for another month. Bones isn't supposed to leave.

Bones is glaring daggers at Jim, a pair of boxer shirts in his tightly clenched up hand. 

“It doesn't matter.”

Eggsy steps fully into the room. “Is this-? Were you going to be gone when I got back?”

Bones lets out a long breath, all the tension seemingly leaving him at once. He unclenches his fist and his shoulders drop.

“Yes,” he admits. “I really don't want to talk about this with you.”

“With me? Why? What did I do?” Eggsy doesn't let the grippling self doubt take hold, doesn't think _I fucked up, I fucked up, I knew I'd fuck up_. Instead, he turns to anger: “What the hell, man! That's so fucking unfair, just disappearing on us!”

“I didn't disappear, did I? I'm still here.” The 'unfortunately' goes unspoken but not unheard.

“You better give me a good fucking reason for this,” Eggsy demands.

“Go ahead,” Jim adds. “Tell him. He'll say the same thing I said.” 

Bones looks from Eggsy to Jim and back. He shakes his head.

“Dammit. It's not you, Eggsy.”

Jim lets out a short laugh. It doesn't sound amused in the slightest. “It's not you, it's me?” he says, voice hard. “Really?”

Bones drops the pair of boxer shorts on the bed.

“Fuck you, Jim,” he spits. “I'm trying to be a good friend!”

“No, you're trying to run away!”

“What's going on?” Eggsy wants to know. “How are you being a good friend by just leaving out of the fucking blue, exactly?”

“A good friend wouldn't have feelings for his damn best friend's boyfriend in the first place, would he?” Bones ask without looking Eggsy in the eyes. “So I'm going back to San Francisco.”

“I keep telling you _it's not that bad_!”

“How exactly is that, Jim? It's real fucking bad. It's the lowest of the low!”

“It's fucking not! You're not leaving!”

Eggsy feels like he's watching them fight in slow motion.

Bones rises up again to face Jim fully.

“You don't tell me what to do, kid.” His voice is eerily calm. “Just because you're all about free love or whatever doesn't make this okay in the fucking slightest.”

“If you'd just listen for one goddamn second, you bull-headed--”

“So,” Eggsy cuts in quietly. “Jim's in love with you, Bones. And with me. And I'm in love with him. And you have feelings for me.” He stops, pauses. “And I have – I don't fucking know what I'm feeling.”

Jim's face is bright red.

Bones tenses. “You're in what with me?” he asks him.

“Don't pretend you didn't know!” Jim throws back, quick to the defense.

“How was I supposed to know?!” Bones asks, anger colouring his voice again. “What the fuck, Jim! You're with Eggsy, you're not supposed to feel anything for me!”

Bones turns to Eggsy and points at him. “I know what you're feeling. You're in love with this idiot there and he's in love with you. That's it. And I'm leaving.”

“Fuck you,” Jim cuts in.

“Don't tell me what to feel,” Eggsy says.

“How were you supposed to know? Maybe when I crawled into your bed every night starting from our second fucking week at the academy! Maybe that's how you were supposed to know!”

Bones looks aghast.

“You think I'd do that with anyone?” Jim asks.

Taking a step back, Bones shakes his head. “I didn't mean to mess you two up,” he says. “I'm gonna go.”

“You didn't mess up anything. Shut up,” Eggsy replies hotly. “Just stop for a minute and we can figure this out.”

Bones shakes his head again. Without picking up his suitcase or any of his clothes that are strewn about the room, he pushes past Eggsy and out of the bedroom door. 

– 

“Do you think he went to the airport?” Jim asks about an hour later from where he's sitting next to Bones' suitcase, Eggsy leaning against his side.

“He didn't take anything with him,” Eggsy says. “And he wouldn't have gotten a flight this fast, right?”

Jim shakes his head. “No. Should we go to the airport? Try and find him if he actually went there?”

“Another dramatic airport scene?” Eggsy asks, half-amused, half-tired. 

A knock on the door has them both looking up. 

“Yeah?” Eggsy asks and the door opens to reveal Harry. 

He raises an eyebrow at the mess.

“How are you?” he asks, addressing both of them. 

Eggsy makes a face and Jim sighs. 

“In case you're looking for Leonard,” Harry says and they both perk up, “He's out in the garden. I think he would rather enjoy some company.”

He leaves them alone after that. 

“Should we go talk to him?” 

Jim looks thoughtful. “Maybe just one of us? I think he's confused and overwhelmed.”

Eggsy smiles at that. “Yeah, I can emphasize.”

“Maybe you should go,” Jim suggests.

Eggsy nods. It makes sense. He hadn't fought with Bones quite as badly as Jim had. 

He's almost out the door, mentally steeling himself for the conversation, when Jim asks, “You do like him, right?”

Eggsy looks back at him. “I'm head over heels.”

Jim's smile is bright and relieved and warms him from the inside out.

–

Bones is sitting up against one of the tall trees, facing away from the house. 

Eggsy drops down in front of him so that he can properly look at him and counts it as a victory that Bones doesn't immediately get up to leave.

Surprisingly, it's Bones who speaks up first. “I really am sorry, Eggsy. You invited me here and I just went and did that. I shouldn't have come in the first place.”

“You didn't do anything, really,” Eggsy tells him. “Apart from having a little freakout maybe.”

Bones doesn't reply. He doesn't look angry anymore, just miserable and apologetic. 

Eggsy is bad at this. He has no experience with relationships, let alone with this mess they've managed to manoeuvre themselves into. 

He decides to just go for it. 

“You're in love with Jim, aren't you?”

Bones looks Eggsy straight in the eyes this time. “Who isn't?”

Eggsy smiles at him. Yeah. He can't imagine not loving Jim, either.

“I really didn't like you at the beginning,” Bones confesses. “I kept thinking that if he could be properly with someone after all, then why not with me? Why with this random kid from England?”

“I'm--”

“Don't be sorry, Eggsy. You're perfect for each other. You're so similar, I swear you're the same person sometimes. Which says a lot about him.”

“And me,” Eggsy adds.

Bones lets out a small laugh. “Yeah, and about you, I guess.”

“Well, I did like you from the beginning.” Eggsy figures it's time for some honesty from him as well. “And it's only gotten stronger since then.”

Bones lets his head fall against the tree behind him. “That's not how it's supposed to go.”

Eggsy doesn't know anything about how this is supposed to go. “We all have feelings for each other. It shouldn't be complicated, right?”

“Right,” Bones agrees quietly. “It shouldn't be.”

–

On the way inside, Eggsy stops Bones just shy of the doorway into the kitchen. He checks that there's no one inside, then leans into Bones' space.

“What?” Bones asks.

Eggsy leans in closer and kisses him.

He's taller than Jim, who's already taller than Eggsy. Bones actually has to lean down a bit towards him but that's – it's good. It's nice. Wonderful. 

As Bones starts to properly respond to the kiss, Eggsy puts his hands on his shoulders, just holding on. One of Bones' hands goes to the back of Eggsy's head, holding him in place. The other is on Eggsy's shoulder.

They don't lean far apart when the kiss ends, still close enough to breathe each other's air.

“I wanted to be first,” Eggsy says like he's telling Bones a secret.

“What?”

“First kiss with you. You haven't ever kissed Jim, have you?”

Bones confirms with a small shake of his head.

“So. He's known you longer, which is unfair. So I wanted the first kiss.”

“Oh my god,” Bones says, leaning his forehead against Eggsy's like all his strength has spontaneously left his body. “What have I gotten myself into with you children?”

Eggsy just grins cheekily and leads him up the stairs.

“Do you want to talk to Jim alone?”

Bones shakes his head. “He's your boyfriend.”

“He wants to be yours, too.”

Bones' face pinks slightly. It's wonderfully endearing.

When they enter the room, Jim is lying diagonally on the bed, his head tipped backwards over the frame, facing them upside down.

Bones frowns. “That's not good for your brain. Or your feet which aren't getting enough blood.”

Jim sits up so quickly he almost falls off the bed.

“Are you really lecturing me now?”

“If you weren't so foolish, I wouldn't have to.”

Eggsy snorts, leaning against the wall. “Romantic, really.”

“Are you still set on leaving?” Jim asks warily.

Bones sits down next to him and casts a look at this suitcase.

“Not if you don't want me to.”

“Yeah, me yelling at you not to leave was really meant to imply that I want you to go.”

Looking over at Eggsy, Bones raises one eyebrow.

Eggsy can't help the smile on his face. “I think you should kiss him.”

“Yeah, I think so, too,” Bones says and does just that.

Jim is wide-eyed for a moment before he does what can only be described as melting into it, clutching at Bones like he's a lifeline. 

It's their first kiss and it's rather innocent, all things considered. But damn, they do look good together. Eggsy shifts on his feet as he watches them.

“I can't believe this is happening,” Jim mumbles.

“Me neither, kid,” Bones admits. He lets go of Jim's waist to stretch his hand out towards Eggsy. 

Without having to be asked, Eggsy steps forwards and lets Bones pull him towards them. 

– 

They all sleep in the bed in Eggsy's room that night.

“This is weird,” Bones says into the darkness.

“It's not,” Jim argues from besides him.

Eggsy rolls onto his side and rests his hand on Bones' chest.

“I feel like I'm intruding.”

Jim lets out a rather long breath. “You're not.”

“Why do I have to be in the middle, then?” Bones challenges.

Eggsy uses his free hand to quietly turn Bones' face towards him in the darkness.

“Because you're always complaining about my kicking and Eggsy gets too hot sometimes,” Jim explains. 

When there's no immediate reply, Jim asks “Bones?”, and then after a moment, “Eggsy?”

They still don't say anything.

“Are you _making out right now_? Now that's just unfair,” Jim complains. “I can't even watch.”

Eggsy snickers into the kiss.

“Oh Jesus,” Bones says. “Both of you are infants.”

“Aw, Bones,” Jim soothes.

“You love it,” Eggsy supplies.

Bones lets Jim rest his head on his chest. He slings an arm around Eggsy's shoulders so that he's lying on him as well.

“No comment,” he says.


End file.
